The Old Woman

I was told. By a person far beyond the reaches of normal wisdom. Over 80 years on this planet. She told me that I am precious. That I am a wonderful spirit and soul with an energy that is robust and incredible. She told me that the love I posess is amazing and caring and should never be taken for granted. That I am beautiful and no one will ever be able to dispute, deny or degrade any of it.  She told me that if someone cannot see this or acknowledge the power of my spirit, that they themselves are simply a waste of my time. Is everything she told me true? I do not know because of what someone has told me. Passed brutal, and calculated judgement upon every single thing about me. I told her this through tears and she told me that I still have a lot to learn and I should not pin my entire self upon one persons opinion. I said that what if this person is someone I love beyond words to discribe. She looked at me through wrinkled eyes at my tears and said, "Well then Marc, this person is blind". Is this true I asked myself. I still do not know. For when you have shared everything about yourself with someone, in the hope one would acknowledge it all and seek to capture it forever. To be loved for everything one is and everything one is not is not something just anyone will do. And when you are loved in such a way, or love in such a way, then NOTHING can change that. NOTHING can take that away. NOTHING will ever make you get over such a thing. But then if you are loved in such a way, then you should be fought for. Funny thing is, when someone is willing to change everything about themselves for someone else, that is love. That is beyond love. One should not have to "change" for loving someone means you love them just the way they are. But it turns out, just the way I am is not good enough. So that is why I seek to change. My god. Who am I? What is my purpose? Is what she told me with all 80 years experience on this god forsaken planet true?! I do not know, perhaps it's just to late to convince me. Fuck.